Month: November 2005

Today I Went to Tefillah

Posted on by Dana

I have been under a lot of stress lately. I have felt burdened. It’s been difficult. I am very behind on my grading, and I need to get caught up. The research paper is starting, and I’ll have plenty to grade as these assignments come in.

At the same time, school is like a haven for me. Even though I’m behind, I feel much less stress at work. There are a litany of issues I’m dealing with right now. The unreliability of my car (not to mention certain people) is really straining my ability to cope.

I guess that’s why I went to tefillah today. Tefillah means prayers, essentially. I’m not required to go, although as a teacher at a Jewish school, I would consider it well within the rights of my headmaster to require it. Instead, he is sensitive to the religious beliefs of his faculty. Actually, he’s sensitive to the differing practices of his students, too. Our students can choose to go to discussion groups rather than prayer groups. I went to the egalitarian minyan service performed by our Conservative Rabbi Pamela Gottfried. It was really nice. I don’t know enough Hebrew to do more than sort of follow along and when I hear a word I recognize, like “Adonai,” I can scan the page for the reference to “Lord.” I kept up pretty well, considering. Rabbi Gottfried and the students were, I think, surprised to see me, but also, I hope, sort of happy. I enjoy listening to Jewish prayer. I think it is very cool that so much of it is sung, and I enjoy it when the students really get into it and supply a beat with their hands on the table or whatever else is handy.

I suppose God doesn’t care if one of His Christian children went to a Jewish prayer service. After all, He’s the same God. I have been called a Judeophile, and I guess I am. The fact is, I joked with my students about this — I would be Jewish if it wasn’t for that whole Jesus thing. I just can’t give Jesus up. I know that a lot of filthy, disgusting, and wrong-headed things have been done in His name, but if you simply read the text of His teachings… Anyway, I really enjoyed the service, and I’ll probably go again.

This may sound strange to you, but Hebrew is really a magic language. I’m not sure if my students really appreciate it because it gets reduced to a class — one more thing to learn — and it’s hard. I look at the Hebrew letters on a page, but they are little more than a jumble of odd lines and dots. I really admire my co-workers and students who have managed to master Hebrew, especially as a second language. I would love to learn. I have been contemplating trying to take a class. But I said Hebrew is magic — and what I meant is that it seems to me that it’s the language of God. I wonder if my students see it that way?

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Thanksgiving Hiatus

Posted on by Dana

I’m back after my Thanksgiving hiatus. I enjoyed a very well cooked meal at my parents’ house. We had a nice visit.

I’m more than a little disgusted by the performance of my car. I have done some research, and I can tell you it isn’t just me. Do not buy a Pontiac Montana. Your mechanic will love you. I just know that I’m in for a huge repair bill soon. The transmission is shifting very rough. It has been off since August or September, but now it gets angry at me if I drive it for a long period of time. The “Service Engine Soon” light comes on constantly — which seems to be a common flaw with this vehicle. This is my customer service announcement to you.

Steve just called. He has been in New York to be interviewed for a segment on Dateline, which will air next Sunday. If you were to look at our life circumstances at this moment, you would marvel at the surreality.

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Posted on by Dana

Dylan was entranced by the animated avatar of Professor McGonagall transforming from a cat into a witch used by a poster at a Harry Potter discussion board I frequent. I asked him if he wanted to see more kitties. I did a Google image search for “cat,” and the first picture that appeared came from a blog kept by a fourteen-year-old Iraqi girl named Raghda. She posts a new picture of a cute cat almost each day. In the midst of all these cute kittens, she posted an entry titled “We Are Living in Hell” after a bomb exploded down the street from her home, shattering her windows and causing the deaths of two children she knew. It’s amazing to me that Raghda is still able to search for and find beauty in this world (in feline form) in the midst of the daily terror in which she lives.

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Sticker Shock

Posted on by Dana

I know I’ve just never mentioned in this blog how I hate cars. </sarcasm>.

Anyway, my car is in the shop. The most pressing thing I need to fix, the head gaskets, will run me $1900. When I can afford it, I also need to fix a leak in the power steering column ($960), the leaking oil pan ($640), and the brakes, which are wearing, but not worn yet ($165). My dad says he can fix the battery cable ($260). In all, I was quoted $3925 worth of repairs.

Ayup. I got that laying around in my sock drawer. Anyway, my dad was good enough to loan me $1000, so I can use the other $1000 that I can afford to put in myself to at least get thing one fixed. I was assured that the other stuff, while necessary to fix, can wait and the car will still go.

I really, really, really hate cars.

My great-great-grandparents spent $20 on a buggy in the 1890’s. Grandma Stella would probably go apoplectic with shock if she knew how much money her great-great-granddaughter would spend on her various and sundry automobile problems over the last five years.

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Reading Lolita in Tehran

Posted on by Dana

I don’t think I’ve ever read a memoir quite like Reading Lolita in Tehran. Azar Nafisi’s book is part recollection of her hardships and those of her students while living in an Islamic “republic,” and part recollection of the novels they read together and the meanings of those novels — how they resonated for each of them. The author/teacher has come to see the two as inextricably linked. As her “magician” says, “You will not be able to write about Austen without writing about us, about this place where you rediscovered Austen. You will not be able to put us out of your head. Try, you’ll see.”

Nafisi divides her recollection across her experiences with four books: Lolita (Vladimir Nabokov), The Great Gatsby (F. Scott Fitzgerald), Daisy Miller (Henry James), and Pride and Prejudice (Jane Austen). When I began this book several months ago, I had not read Lolita, and in fact, picked it up because of this book (I had read all the others). I found several passages in the section about Gatsby that I intend to ask at least my Honors students to read. I actually came to have a new appreciation for Daisy Miller, which I didn’t remember liking very much when I read it in college.

Nafisi began a literature class for women out of her home after being fired from the University of Tehran for refusing to wear the veil. I found her accounts of teaching Gatsby in the university to be more interesting than her accounts of the secret literature class. To be honest, I found it difficult to keep up with all the characters. I’m not sure if this was due to the non-Western names or some other lack of mine or whether it was a failing of Nafisi’s. Perhaps other readers can comment with their thoughts on this.

In the Epilogue, Nafisi writes, “I left Tehran on June 24, 1997, for the green light that Gatsby once believed in.” It seems as if Nafisi’s characters have a love/hate relationship with the West. Many see it as a haven, while others revile it for its secularism and sinfulness, but most feel some sort of complex mixture of the two. In many ways, Nafisi’s relationship with Iran may be viewed the same way. She describes her homeland with sensuality one moment and disgust the next. Probably the most memorable passage recalled when Nafisi remarked to her husband that “living in the Islamic Republic is like having sex with a man you loathe… you make your mind blank — you pretend to be somewhere else, you tend to forget your body, you hate your body.” It seems that books helped Nafisi escape. Books are the “somewhere else” that Nafisi went went real life became too much.

I think this book should be required reading for anyone who loves literature, especially literature teachers. It is a passionate defense of reading for the sake of reading, but also for the impact that literature can have on one’s life.

Note: I’m aware that the review image looks wonky with the hover hyperlink. I’ve been playing with the CSS, but I can’t keep it from working on the review image unless I take it off the rest of the site, and frankly, that would involve lots of color changes, because you can’t tell the text is a link without an underline. I’ve asked for help, so hopefully I can fix it soon. I decided it would be the lesser of two evils to let the review look wonky until I can fix it rather than make the links too hard to find.

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Genealogy Blog

Posted on by Dana

I have tweaked the template for my genealogy blog. Steve said he liked it, but I’m always willing to hear a second opinion. I’m also uploading bits of my grandfather’s letter to me each day. If you are interested in WWII, I think you would find what he has to say, well, interesting. He lived it, after all. I didn’t know he’d experienced the things he told me.

I think of all the people who ever stop by here, certainly my sister Lara will be interested, but if memory serves, Cranky is also a WWII aficionado (albeit, from what I recall, it was more Eurpoean theatre rather than Pacific, which was where my grandfather was).

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Letter to Papa

Posted on by Dana

Yesterday, I mentioned receiving a fantastic letter from my Papa. I wrote him back, and I thought it might be interesting to post my reply here.

Dear Papa,

I filched this tablet from school, ostensibly to take notes at a conference for Georgia private school teachers on Monday (11/7). But I’m going to use some of it to write you back.

I really enjoyed your letter. I read it in one sitting. You joke about my red pen, but you are an excellent writer with a real gift for telling stories. Mom always told me that, but I guess it’s been so long since we corresponded regularly… I guess I forgot. Somehow, e-mail just isn’t the same.

Thank you for writing me. I appreciated it a great deal. It sounds like your time in the war was really interesting. I enjoyed your school stories, too. The one about the principal spanking that little girl was so awful. As teachers, we have the power to inspire lasting learning and to inspire respect and love. We also have the power to hurt. Everyone has stories about a teacher who harmed us. I don’t have any as bad as yours. Mom still hates Miss Allen from South [Middle School in Aurora, CO.] for breaking her new crayon. Wayne had Miss Allen. [Wayne is my mother’s brother.] Years later when I went to South, I had her, too. I have pleasant memories of her — I wasn’t good at art, but she encouraged me.

I read up on Gen. Buckner on the Internet. Did you know that his father, Gen. Simon Bolivar Buckner, Sr., was a Confederate general during the Civil War? He surrendered Ft. Donelson to U.S. Grant. He was also governor of Kentucky. Interestingly, Gen. Buckner, Jr.’s commander was Gen. MacArthur, son of Union General Arthur MacArthur. The WWII generals fought together. Their fathers “fought each other.”

Of course we had several Confederate veterans in our family:

  • Johnson Franklin Cunningham (based on a story handed down — no proof)
  • William J. Bowling (POW!)
  • John Thomas Stallings
  • Oliver S. Kennedy (Stella’s uncle)

Probably more I can’t recall off the top of my head. My college friend Greg Goodrich died in Iraq last year. He saved 10 people before he was killed. He was in a convoy & they were ambushed outside Abu Ghraib. He was awarded the Bronze Star, the Purple Heart, the Meritorious Medal, and the Army Commendation Medal. Posthumously, of course. He was a very smart man who couldn’t stomach teaching — public education is a shambles. I didn’t hear about his death until 8 months after it happened, but I wrote his dad to express my sympathy.

One of my students lost her mom to cancer last week (or week before?). Lots of sadness. She seems OK, but she’s not. She can’t be.

My car is in the shop. I’m praying it won’t be too bad. It’s leaking transmission fluid. I’m hoping maybe it just needs to be resealed. It had been shifting kind of rough in first & second gears especially.

Granna [my grandmother] said you thought I might have trouble reading your handwriting. I didn’t. I am finding that my students cannot read mine. Actually, I don’t think it’s that bad. I just don’t think they really teach it now, what with computers. They practically can’t write unless you let them do it on a computer. It’s kind of sad.

I’m really happy at my job. My students are great. Steve, the kids, and I are all going to camp in the North Georgia mountains with our school. It is a sabbath trip called a Shabbaton. I’m leading a journaling exercise. I’m told they have a hotel at the camp, but I imagine we’ll stay in the bunks. We can’t afford a hotel — probably especially after our car!

My students are pretty good kids — smart, funny. They seem to enjoy my classes. I am teaching 10th grade American Lit. and 9th grade Grammar, Composition, and Literature. I would like to teach British Lit. sometimes.

My students are going to Boston this year, as my former 10th graders did last year. I hope I can go again, but they may want to give someone else a chance. I loved it. I had so much fun. I got to see Ha. The 9th graders were going to New Orleans, but I guess that won’t happen now. Wonder what they’ll do instead.

Steve’s choir may go to England this summer. If they do, they said spouses can come. I would sure love that. Spouses wouldn’t be free, but paying for one is cheaper than two. I worry about what we could do with Dylan and Maggie. Maybe if it was arranged in advance we could get Mom to keep them.

What do you like to read? I can’t remember that we ever talked about it. Mom likes mysteries. I don’t really care about mysteries one way or the other. I have read some great books the last couple of years.

  • The Dante Club — Matthew Pearl (a series of murders based on Dante’s Inferno in 1865 Boston — only literary giants Henry Wadsworth Longfellow, Oliver Wendell Holmes, and James Russell Lowell can solve it!)
  • The Ghost Writer — John Harwood (a creepy Turn of the Screw type story)
  • The Egyptologist — Arthur Phillips (an ancient Egypt nut tries to leave his mark in Egyptology. It was funny!)
  • Girl in Hycinth Blue — Susan Vreeland (ownership of a painting and its story traced back from owner back to its creation.)

There’s more. That’s just a few.

My city, Roswell, is doing a “Roswell Reads” program. Residents vote on a book from several choices to read. The city is like one big book club! They’re going to try to get the author to speak at a special event. I’m going to participate, but I’ve read one of the choices already. All of them look good.

Well, I’m going to close for now. Maggie is bugging me for some Kool-Aid.

Thanks again for the letter.

Love,

Dana

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Papa

Posted on by Dana

I received a letter from my grandfather (I call him Papa) in the mail today. He turned 80 in May, and it made me realize that our time together may not… I can’t even say it. It’s devastating to think about. My grandfather is gruff, cantankerous, ornery, and just the sweetest old man in the world. If you’ve ever known someone like that, you can picture him, I’m sure. Babies and animals can see right through the near-permanent frown.

Anyway, I wanted to have some of his memories. I asked him to write down his stories. He filled up nearly two 50-page tablets (those writing tablets have always been his preferred stationary). He told me a lot about his schooldays and his stint in the Navy in WWII. Sometimes his reflections were funny. Sometimes sad. I plan to post some of his letter to me at my genealogy blog. Just to give you taste (and so you can see what a gifted writer he is), I’m putting a teaser here.

So you want me to write about things that I have done, seen or heard in my many years of experiences. I hope you know that historians claim that people as old as I usually forget things, embellish the things that they remember. I also will tell some things that happened during my lifetime. Please, please put the red correction pencil away [why must my family perpetually accuse me of grading their correspondence???]. I know that I break every grammatical rule ever made. I plan to relate tales, stories or whatever that I know happened, but historians tell about the events in a vastly different manner… So if you’re ready, here goes the B.S.

Before it gets to late, ask for their stories. Whoever “they” are for you. I received a priceless gift in the mail — my grandfather even insured it! He knows what this will mean to me and to my family in the future.

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